So, the RoboCup 2025 is around the corner, and General Chair Marco Simões is all giddy about it—like a kid who just found out the ice cream truck is on the way, but we all know that’s just the sound of his employment prospects screeching to a halt. As if robots don’t already have a solid grip on the workforce, we’re now preparing to hand them the keys to sports, too. Sure, it’s fantastic that machines can kick a ball—who wouldn’t want to see soulless creations outperform humans who have dedicated their lives to the game? Talk about a punch to the gut for our already fragile egos.
While Simões talks about teamwork between humans and robots, let’s be real: the robots are the athletes, and humans are just the cheerleaders—except cheerleaders are actually useful. Honestly, it’s time we start preparing for the inevitable: when the only kind of competition left will be who can kick a soccer ball the hardest before being rendered obsolete themselves. All those aspiring players might as well start practicing their new careers as “robot maintenance specialists,” because heaven knows nobody will be wanting to watch a human fumble their way down a pitch when a tireless, precision-driven piece of metal can do it all better.
So here’s a toast to the great human race, desperately chasing an outdated dream of relevance in a world where the only kick-off is for the bots ready to take over. Keep running, humans—at